“I have
something for you,” Craig said, “three gentle,
longhorns which would fit well as lead steers in
your cattle drive operation.”
“Well, I’ve always wanted a nice set of steer
horns,” I replied. “How much do you want for them?”
“Nothing,” he fired back. “Take them; they’re free.”
Knowing Craig had fallen on hard times, I offered,
“How about I give you one hundred dollars for each
one?”
“Whatever, I just need them gone because I am out of
feed and money. Can you bring your trailer out
today?” Craig asked.
“Sure; I’ll saddle a couple horses and be out after
work,” I answered as I chuckled at my good fortune.
The day passed quickly and soon my friend Jeremy and
I pulled into the driveway of Craig’s 20 acre hobby
farm. There were hog panels strung through the
timber and tied to a loafing shed and if the baling
twine held, this make-shift corral would serve as a
loading chute. We hopped our horses out of the
trailer, backed up to the gate, hit the saddle and
trotted into the timber searching for the longhorns.
Just as Craig had said, the steers were not the
least bit concerned by our presence, mostly because
they knew they held all the cards. Each steer slowly
rose, yawned and curled their tails over their backs
as they stretched, as if they had not a care in the
world. My first lesson in longhorn management was
about to begin.
It would take seven pages for me to describe the
events of the next two days, so I will just say
those three steers were the most polite critters I
have ever moved with a horse. Exhibiting no ill
will, each would quietly walk into the corral,
measure the panel height with their chin and clear
it in a single bound before meandering back into the
timber. Jeremy and I were sweating, galloping and
swearing to the best of our abilities while Craig
held the trailer gate chuckling at his good fortune.
Eventually, I hauled all three steers to Wyoming,
but it would be a stretch to call it a victory
because all I did was move Craig’s problem to my
place. Over the next three years, two of those fence
crawling steers caused me more grief than all the
other cows in my herd. The third steer quickly
became my favorite because he was struck by
lightning and killed his first weekend in Wyoming.
Every time I rode past his decomposing carcass on
the hilltop, I chuckled at my good fortune because
my headaches had been cut by a full third from a
single bolt of lightning and this brings me to my
point. Legislation is like free longhorn steers; it
comes with strings attached.
House Bill 142, an “act assenting to the federal
Dingell-Johnson act of 1950” allows fishing
equipment federal taxes to be redistributed to state
fish and game agencies. This places roughly four
million dollars in Montana’s Fish, Wildlife and
Parks budget and 95 House members approved the act.
Five of us did not, so sportsman groups will
chastise us in the next election cycle for being
anti-angler and hating little children. (We are
always portrayed as hating children.) The free money
in the Dingell-Johnson act is not really free. Take
a look.
The federal budget is divided into discretionary and
non-discretionary spending with the latter category,
also called entitlements, consuming nearly 100
percent of all federal revenues. This means
discretionary spending, subdivided into defense and
non-defense is 100 percent borrowed money which is
rolled into our 16.4 trillion dollar debt.
Therefore, the four million dollar federal fishing
gift to our Treasure State is not actually money, it
is debt. When the little children discover all the
wonderful Fish, Wildlife and Parks programs were
funded by debt, burdening them with the cost of
their angling activities along with those of their
parents and grandparents, they will not be chuckling
at their good fortune.
Spending has bankrupted our nation and the disease
is not quarantined to Washington D.C. Every program
supported at every level by every official at the
request of every citizen, adds to the problem. Think
about it. How can you demand elected officials quit
spending money when you simultaneously insist they
do so? Our economic predicament is nothing to
chuckle about.
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