Weekly Posting of the Conservative Cow Doctor

Proverbial Knock at the Door

The trophy wife and I received Apple watches for Christmas, and we discovered one of their unique features at 3:45 last Wednesday morning. I had just fetched a couple cups of coffee when Druann jerked her Apple watch from the charger, tossed it on the bed alongside her Bible, and fluffed her pillow preparing for our morning reading. We were studying Proverbs but before we began, her watch buzzed 9-1-1. This is a watch safety feature alerting EMS after sensing a violent motion such as what would occur in a bicycle crash. The trophy wife quickly canceled the call, but the cat was out of the bag. Within minutes, the Laurel police phoned asking about our emergency. Druann explained the Apple watch mishap, and the case was closed, so we thought. Fifteen minutes later, while discussing King Solomon’s wisdom, I heard a tap, tap, tap on our front door. “Was that a knock?” I asked. Druann spotted taillights in our driveway, so I hustled to the front door where I was greeted by two Yellowstone County deputies asking about our 9-1-1 call. I explained about the trophy wife upsetting her apple cart, but they needed to hear it from her, so I summoned Druann from the bedroom. Had she appeared sporting a black-eye, things could have been ticklish, but she did not, so it was not and here is why this is timely.

The ruling class, big tech, and media propagandists are giddy after successfully coronating President Biden. The president’s customary inauguration calls for unity were drowned out by elitists screaming this is the time to punish 75 million patriots who believe in America’s founding principles of liberty and limited government. To the left, obedience to the collective and accepting their belief ours is an inherently racist nation is the hallmark of proper patriotism. Resistors will be forcibly deprogramed, a technique perfected by Chairman Mao during China’s Cultural Revolution. Patriots rejecting state-sponsored enlightenment will be disappeared, and this brings me to my point.

If you supported President Trump publicly, own a MAGA flag, or wave our stars and stripes on days other than national holidays, you may have been flagged as needing re-education. You best sleep in your best underwear, sweatpants, and a hoodie because you will never know when the tap, tap, tap on your window is a secret government enforcer inviting you to summer camp. Once secured on the short bus, you will not be back, and unity will be achieved.