Weekly Posting of the Conservative Cow Doctor

Rockin' and Talkin'

I typically set the scene with a personal story and then morph it to make my political point. When this column began in 2006, I had a gunny sack full of unique life experiences but after 15 years, that sack is mostly empty. Each week I search my story sack for one more idea like it was a McDonald’s bag with one French fry hiding under the fold in the bottom. Finding one is getting tougher and tougher. My practice load prevents me from adding new memories plus rather than high speed excitement, now my summer evenings are spent riding our porch swing with the trophy wife. Once the sun has set and the temperature has dropped to the bottom half of the 90s, we open a bottle of wine or brew a fresh pot of coffee and begin rockin’ and talkin’ about the day. Because Druann spends much of her day in the electronic vortex she needs to vent to another human. The kids are gone, Cash, our old dog is deaf, and Blinker, our new pup, has a very short attention span, so I am her human.

Decompressing on the porch swing is meaningful and the trophy wife and I celebrated our 42nd anniversary last week. Because the 1st anniversary is paper, the 10th is tin, the 25th is silver and the 50th is gold, I figured plastic irrigating dams—the silver, UV-resistant ones—fit the 42nd. She is one lucky woman.

While discussing the day’s top topics, we agreed watching President Biden and his Marxist minions purposely destroy America is the most frustrating time of our 42 years. Both of us grew up in middle-class, small-town America; she, the daughter of a carpenter and me the son of a rancher. We worked our way through college, raised a family and had each other’s back during times of lack and times of plenty. To the woke worshippers of CRT, we are oppressors of the worst degree, but God made us this way. We are non-masked, non-poked, physically fit, vitamin D enriched, happily married heterosexual, Christian conservative Republicans with enough ivermectin in our pantry to flatten our community’s Covid curve. Rather than fear what the ruling class tells us to fear, we battle the ruling class and their ridiculous decrees, and invite you to join us. In 1776, Thomas Paine wrote, “These are the times which try men’s souls. The summer soldier and sunshine patriot shrink from the service of their country; but he who stands by it now, deserves the love and thanks of man and woman.” His words still fit.